Warring Poems 1-5

I have started a new collection of poems about the battles and wars that we as humans go through. Depression, heart break, various mental and physical health illnesses, we are warriors and we have been warring since the day we were born. This collection is all about us: the warriors that keep going even when the battles have been lost; we will win the war. We are warring!

When
How deep is our misery?
When Angels crash
and Thunderbirds fall?
Are we blind to the signs
Falling from the skies?
When? When?
When will it all become fair?
When will we learn? When will we see?

How deep is our pain?
When we weep
And no tears fall?
Making our lives a living nightmare,
Too afraid to go to sleep
-Scared to death to wake up-
When? When?
When will we stop gasping for air?
When will we learn? When will we see?

How much more can we take?
When the compass has broken
And we are going insane?
Too late to turn back
Not that we wanted to anyway.
When? When?
When will everything start to make sense?
When will we learn? When will we see?

Roar
Racing in the woods
Fighting through the maze.
Who can scream the loudest?
Who can last the longest?
ROAR!

The blood of the tiger leaks
Wounded in false victory
Rivers streak the face of the age old sage.
ROAR!

Leaping with limited hope
ROAR!
Running on empty to the edge of the rope.
ROAR!

The blood of the tiger leaks
Wounded in false victory.
Finish line so close
ROAR!

The mystery of the maze
Answered in the eye of the tiger’s blaze.

Screaming Loud
I open my eyes; step into the battle scene
Trying my best to be seen
Oh-oh- how I want to be heard
I’m screaming loud but nothing is coming out
Nothing is coming out.

Empty noise lost in space
Cause forgotten
One big mistake
I am screaming loud but nothing is coming out
Nothing is coming out.

I’m losing the battles
I’m losing the war
And I- I just want to go home.

Oh I’m losing the battles
I’m losing the war
I’m screaming loud but nothing is coming out
Nothing is coming out
Nothing is coming

I’m losing the battles
I’m losing the war
I’m screaming loud but nothing is coming out.

An Exercise in Anxiety54321
I’m really sorry to bother you again;
You’re the only one willing to run into the mess with me.
5: books- all around each screaming; papers- flying everywhere;
co
mputer-lit await the worst not expecting the best;
Sweater even though it’s 100 degrees; door- hope won’t slam shut.
4: my heart beating as if it was a race car; my throat aching- I can only scream so far; my hair- so soft don’t want to pull it out, but cool metal is calling.
3: my breathing so loud is getting shallow; the birds outside what I would give to fly; the wind whispering “nothing will ever be right”
2: the rust of oxygen all used up; the sweet air of spring heat rotting away
1: I have nothing left- all the things have gone away
I’m really sorry to bother you again
Anxiety has me running circles
Chasing a tail I never had, and dreams become broken glass.
Exercise addiction in anxiety;
This is my 54321
Silence Tears Us Apart
Saw the update
Social media a cruel truth.
My lungs closed off
My heart ached, and started to flame
And yet silent I remained.
The whispers around me,
Empty in meaning but the
Words sharpened like knives
Wanting the memories to leave
I say nothing- silently grief.
I’m swallowing tears and letters
In hopes that my eyes don’t betray me
But it is like adding  gas to the fire enclosing me.
Silence tears us apart.

Numb
A trip to the restroom
Put in the restrictions.
A quick stop at the local pharmacy
Cookies, plants, and flour
A burning cold shower
A whole body cover
Anything to stop
The numb.

 

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