Fighting to Find A Way

So before I get started, happy birthday to September babies! A beautiful and amazing soul is having a birthday on September 14, another great friend of mine who has helped me out a lot is tuning 23 on September 17, and my aunt and the woman who showed me my beautiful truths have birthdays September 29.

 

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Our Stories Are Not Over Yet

So September is a dark weird month for me. 1) Classes and stress start (haha I’m a nerd so it’s good stress) 2) it is National Suicide Prevention Month

This week is suicide prevention week and on September 10 is suicide prevention day.

Suicidal thoughts can affect anyone regardless of age, gender or background. Suicide is the third leading cause of death among young people and is often the result of mental health conditions that effect people when they are most vulnerable. Suicidal thoughts and suicide occur too frequently but should not be considered common and can indicate more serious issues. In many cases the individuals, friends and families affected by suicide are left in dark, feeling shame or stigma that prevents talking openly about issues dealing with suicide.

So this is what the next three post are about. I won’t sugar coat anything (I never do); I won’t make jokes or witty comments because suicide is not joke.

Also, suicide is not an act of cowardice, it is not attention seeking, it’s not a joke.

White males accounted for 7 of 10 suicides in 2014.Men die by suicide 3.5x more often than women. On average, there are 117 suicides per day.

Being suicidal does not necessarily mean putting a gun to your head. It sometimes means smoking and hoping you get cancer. Sometimes it means jaywalking praying a car or an eighteen wheeler will hit you. Sometimes it means not sleeping and not eating in hopes you’ll die from exhaustion.

Sometimes being suicidal means you are cruel and mean to your family and friends so they stop caring about you and you no longer have a reason to live.

Myth 1: Asking someone about suicide will cause him to become suicidal

There’s already issues and struggles around mental illness within our culture and society. It’s highly stigmatized, and suicide is even more stigmatized. It feels like something that’s just best left unsaid or untouched, kept under the rug, and that’s a problem in terms of saving lives. Because we need to ask, and we need to intervene to actually save lives. You need to be direct. ‘Sounds like you’re really down, have you thought about taking your life?’ Just very direct. The more direct the better.

Asking if someone is thinking about suicide might save that person’s life.

Myth 2: Depression causes all suicides

That’s just not true. So, we have millions of Americans who are depressed. A small fraction of them take their lives, a very small fraction. So depression and suicide are not synonymous. Other diagnoses are relevant — like schizophrenia, psychotic disorders, substance abuse, anxiety disorders. It’s not just all about depression.”

Myth 3: We cannot really prevent suicides

We know very clearly that, with proper identification, proper support and treatments that are suicide-specific, we absolutely can make a difference and save lives. Most suicidal people who talk about suicide don’t really want to be dead. They’re giving other people lots of indications, lots of warning signs, lots of communications that this is something that they would like to not do, but it requires people identifying that and getting them the proper help.

Some of the warning signs would certainly be depression and loss of concentration. People not seeming like themselves. Insomnia can be a big risk factor. Other warning signs might include irritability, withdrawal. And the thing that’s really critical: Lots of people have those symptoms and are not thinking about suicide. It’s really when the symptoms add up in the mind of that person, where they think ‘The way I deal with this is to take my life.

Myth 4: Suicides always happen in an impulsive moment

People contemplate, think about it, imagine it, fantasize about it, write suicide notes, and post things on the Web. After many days or weeks, [they] then perhaps make a fatal attempt. There is a major theory in the field that says that no suicides are impulsive. That there is always a history if you dig deep enough.

The idea that they come out of the blue may happen, but it’s actually quite rare. A small number of people, especially among adolescents or school kids, are not going to communicate their intent. But that’s the exception. They’re going to be mostly letting their friends know, dropping hints, and writing essays that their English teacher might pick up, telling teachers and coaches. So when people say this, they’re not crying wolf. It’s something to take seriously.

Myth 5: Young children, ages 5 through 12, cannot be suicidal

Kids telling other kids is really critical because that’s who they’re going tell. They are not going to typically tell their parents. They get oftentimes a very negative reaction, even a punitive reaction. So, schools are in a position to try to communicate to kids that talking to your friends is fine, but if you really are a friend of this person, keeping a secret about something as serious as suicide is not in their best interest. And they need to pass that information up to teachers or the principal or to … counselors who are in a position to get professional help involved.

Young children do take their lives. In the United States each year, about 30 to 35 children under the age of 12 take their own lives. It’s hard for a lot of us to imagine that a child that young a 5-, 6-, 7-year-old could actually know what it means to say, ‘I want to kill myself.’ But we do research with young children and know that kids are saying these words.

They do intend it, and they do sometimes take their lives. Oftentimes, by running into traffic and getting hit by a car. We don’t know a lot about young children taking their lives. The suicide prevention literature kind of begins at age 12 to 14. It’s almost as if, even in the professional literature, young children can’t be suicidal. And it’s just not the case.

Please don’t pretend anymore. Don’t hide behind a smile when it hurts to wake up because you are disappointed you didn’t die. Please don’t pretend anymore. Seek help, you are not alone. I know it’s dark right now, but the sun will shine one day, I promise.

If you or anyone you know is having suicidal thoughts please call the National Suicide Hotline 1-800-273 TALK (8255) or text 741741.

If you are not in America click here it has hotlines for almost every country in the world and in your native language.

I am available as well, but please don’t leave tonight, don’t leave tomorrow. Stay and together we can see the darkness disappear and the sun rise because I promise it will rise.

“And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” ~ Revelations 21:4

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