13 Reasons Why: Cheesecake and Depression

Hello cheesecake eaters! Sorry for the long wait, I got a second part time job and my life has been extremely busy. So!!! Happy news: today marks one year since I started this masterpiece! We have come a long way. We have seen the best of humanity (I don’t have a link of that, but picture the best of humanity) and the worst of humanity. We have gone deep into my mind and listened to ranting of the most insane kind (thank you) and you my cheesecake eaters have stood with me through it! Merci!

So today I want to pick up where I left off. This is reason number two: depression.

Oh, but it’s one year, why depression? Well, would you like me to talk about rape? Or suicide? Or PTSD? Or bullying? Or 7 other reasons each more heartbreaking then the next? No?

So, depression.

depression

Okay what is depression? No, depression is not feeling sad, and sometimes, most often, there is nothing wrong. Ranting of a Mad Woman# 5 talks about how depression makes the world seem gray. Like it is washed up. Everything can be going right in a person’s life but if they have clinical depression or major depressive disorder, then they are depressed.

“That’s the thing about depression: A human being can survive almost anything, as long as she sees the end in sight. But depression is so insidious, and it compounds daily, that it’s impossible to ever see the end.”  ― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation

Depression (major depressive disorder or clinical depression) is a common but serious mood disorder. It causes severe symptoms that affect how you feel, think, and handle daily activities, such as sleeping, eating, or working.

I would like to point out that there is functioning depression, this is where a person feels depressed (like life has not meaning and there is no reason to even get up in the morning) but due to certain factors they can manage by putting a fake smile on their faces. The people who I have spoken to that have functioning depression say that it is mentally, physically, and overall exhausting. Think about it, acting like everything is fine when inside you feel like you are dying is one of the hardest things to do. Faking a smile just so you don’t have to explain to people what is wrong, just so you are not a burden or judged is exhausting.

This what Hannah Baker from 13 Reasons Why did. She was dying inside, yet she said nothing to her parents or to anyone because she did not want to be a burden or “a drama queen.” She smiled till she died.

Why didn’t Hannah get help? Well she tired, but I don’t think she, herself, knew she had depression. To be diagnosed with depression, the symptoms must be present for at least two weeks. So what are the symptoms?

Persistent sad, anxious, or “empty” mood (most of the time it will be empty, like life has no purpose or you are stuck in repeat.)

Feelings of hopelessness, or pessimism

Irritability (often seen as anger)

Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness

Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities (again, life is meaningless so why bother with fun)

Decreased energy or fatigue

Moving or talking more slowly or not talking at all

Feeling restless or having trouble sitting still

Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions

Difficulty sleeping, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping

Appetite and/or weight changes

Thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide attempts

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Aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems without a clear physical cause and/or that do not ease even with treatment

These are just a few symptoms, but here is the really painful part, that I feel we should all remember. Not everyone who is depressed experiences every symptom. Some people experience only a few symptoms while others may experience many. Some people can hide their depression until it is too late.

“Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also more hard to bear. The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden: it is easier to say “My tooth is aching” than to say “My heart is broken.”  ― C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

However, there is treatment. Most of the time there is talk therapy and medications that can help. This is not to say that all people who are depressed need medication just like not all people who are depressed have suicidal thoughts or attempts. Depression affects everyone differently.

My dearest cheesecake eaters, words of wisdom: 1) you don’t know what is going on in the lives of others, don’t judge 2) if you do know what is going on in the lives of others, you don’t know 100% of the time what is going on in their heads, always be kind 3) if someone is depressed DO NOT tell ask them why or say that people have it worse than them. Do not invalidate them. Everyone has their own reality and sometimes reality sucks because people with depression want stop being not just depressed but often times they want to stop being them. 4) always help and do no harm, if you do not know the facts (and I mean all the facts) stuff your mouth with cheesecake and don’t say a word. 5) always help and do no harm, if you are going to use an opinion or say something offensive stuff your mouth with cheesecake and don’t say a word. 6) offer cheesecake because it is delicious #RandomActsOfKindness.

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Happy first birthday Genius and Insanity, you truly are the fine line. Stay tone for whenever for Reason Number 3.

“If you hear a song that makes you cry and you don’t want to cry anymore, you don’t listen to that song anymore. But you can’t get away from yourself. You can’t decide not to see yourself anymore. You can’t decide to turn off the noise in your head.”

― Jay Asher, Thirteen Reasons Why

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4 thoughts on “13 Reasons Why: Cheesecake and Depression

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